Fork in the Road: “When You Know You Will Be LAST!” BEATING THE ENEMY WITHIN

In life there are crossroads and these paths will determine your destiny. What do you do when you come to the fork in the road? Do you take the path least traveled, go the way that most people go, or turn back around? This was the decision I had to make when I stood on the starting line last Saturday morning to run my first official race of the 2017 Cross Country season.

Sweat was running down my back and the race didn't even begin yet. Fear started to grip me and I could not understand why I was so scared. I’ve run this course many times by myself, with the kids and with my track team. I was reminded by my bestie, Kisha my running partner, that I was on our home field. I should have felt comfortable but I wasn’t. I wanted to kick of my running sneaks and sit in the car.

Then I started thinking about how I use to run this course. If this was 10 years ago, I would have completed the race in a little over 25 minutes. Now, I am almost 10 minutes slower and would be happy just to make it up the 3 hills without walking. My mind started coming up with excuses. “It’s hot out today, you would do better if it was cooler”, “You can sit this one out, there are 5 meets to go” and "You know how your race anxiety is setup”, but I had to find a way to shut all these negative thoughts up.

So, I put on my ear phones, turned on my music, and started talking to myself. I asked myself, “Why are you so scared? You have done this many, many times before and you just ran the course last Thursday”. Then it hit me, I was at the fork in the road. I knew the times of everyone out there expect  one woman. If you know anything about running cross country, the Open Women run with the high school students and occasionally there are some we beat, but when I sized up the field that day, I realized that today was not that day. All the Open Women started having a conversation because check in was a little long. Then the only woman, who time I did not know, said she use to run this course in high school in 19 minutes. Well, I’ve never run any 5k course that fast and after that the anxiety really kicked in on full blast. She said she was not in running shape but does aerobics all the time, and you could tell. She looked powerful.

Then I had to face the source of my fear, “WHAT DO YOU DO, WHEN YOU KNOW, YOU WILL BE LAST?” I know most of you are saying, what does this have to do with real life, I am not a runner, but life will have situations that even giving your best,  you still will come up short. I had to make a choice was I going to go out fighting or was I going to lie down. Well, I am an Overcomer. So, I got on that line and I realized that the race is not with the person beside you, the race is with the person within. I was determined to run my race. I started off slow and steady. I had to fight the anxiety off the whole entire time but I did not walk up the hills and I finished the 5k run like I was running the 100-meter dash. No, I was not first, I was last. I beat the negative thoughts demon. I gave it my all. I even dropped my time by 1 minute and 4 seconds. I took the road least traveled. Last place felt like first place because I BEAT THE ENEMY WITHIN.

YOU STOPPED CARING

I thought I wanted to be a blogger. I wanted to motivate people and help them change their mindset so they could change their life.

But, I do not really write my Blog anymore. Did I stop caring about it? Did I stop caring about inspiring woman to be the best them they can possibly be?

Maybe I did. Has this ever happen to you? You start out on a journey and at first you are on fire then you realize that it's hard. Not a little hard, but extremely difficult and takes more dedication than you thought.

So, you stop doing what you set out to do. You come up with excuses that help you get over the fact that you “GAVE UP”, “YOU QUIT”.

Well this morning, I realized that I gave up, I gracefully bowed out. While taking my son to school, we listen to motivational speakers to set a positive tone to our day. A YouTube video titled “I’m Not Here To Be Average” was our choice and it had me thinking.. Thinking hard and I knew in that moment I had to write about it. I had to ask myself, “DID I STOP CARING?”

The gentleman went on to say, “You have to Care more than Normal and more than Necessary for your Results. Those who let themselves off the hook gave themselves permission not to Care anymore”.

This struck a cord in me because it was true. I gave myself permission not to care. Well, today I revoke that permission.

It does not matter how hard it is; It does not matter how much dedication it takes; I will accomplish my goals.

I will get up each morning complete the hardest task of my day. I will write for my blog.

If there is something you want to accomplish and it is difficult. Do not put it off to the end of the day. Do what is difficult FIRST. Completing your hardest task first thing in the morning will make you feel successful and create a positive start to your day. 

You might have to get up a little earlier, but the commitment to yourself will payoff in the end.

Even though, your goal might be a challenging ONE and even seem impossible don't give up and

Remember

You have to CARE more than NORMAL and more than NECESSARY about your RESULTS.

YOU WILL BE VICTORIOUS.

#DrSheenaSpeaks

#InspireU

WHO AM I ?

There comes a time in a woman’s life where she starts to wonder “WHO AM I”? The timing of this question is different for ever woman but no matter what it tends to arrive. Now some of you are saying, “Not me, I know who I am and I know what I want!”, but this question will still surface because things about you change.

In my twenties, I thought I had it all together, I was a wife, a mother, a career woman and as my children grew up I found myself getting lost in everyone’s world except my own. Yes, I did the basic things for myself like went to college and obtained several degrees to earn a better living for my family but, I was so consumed with making sure everyone was pursuing their dreams that I forgot all about mine. I stopped running, did not have any hobbies, began to gain weight, and then I realized I was unhappy.

Now, I was not unhappy with my life. I worked hard to have the lifestyle I was living but I lost me in the process. How many of you have lost yourself in the midst of taking care of your family and putting their needs first? A woman’s job is hard. She has to be a wife, mother, taxi, nurse, caregiver, professional, and the list goes on. These are just the roles you play, not really who you are.

WHO AM I? Is that special essence that makes you different from all the rest. It’s the thing that makes you get up in the morning and help you accomplish your goals. It’s that thing you fight to find because once you realize and obtain it you know you will be whole.

Now this journey will not be easy and you might take a while to find yourself again, but the soul searching will be worth it.

My Soul revealed that…..

I am
        a Writer

                      an  Author

                                   a  Runner

                                                  an Exhorter

                                                                                                                           

So, ladies, ask yourself “Who Am I?” and spend the rest of your life perfecting her.

#InspireU #DrWilsonspeaks

Name It Claim It

Name It Claim It

In life it comes a time when you realize the only limitations the world put on you are the ones you put on yourself. It's funny how this realization comes about for people. For me, it's came from my Autistic Son Zion, who says, what he going to do and does it. 

Now, it would be easier said than done, if he was a natural at doing the things he tries but he always has limited skills when he begins. What's amazing about him is that he does not mind starting at the bottom because he says there's only one way to go, UP. 

He taught me so much about being limitless and how a can do spirit can make a difference in anything you do in life. He is so optimistic and plays the Name It and Claim It game. I am so impressed with how he overcomes every obstacle that Autism puts in front of him. 

When he began playing football, he would chase his shadow and this year he was awarded MVP Defensive End of his 130 pound team. It took time, determination, and skill development but he never quit. Then he told me, he would be on honor roll. I knew that would be a task because he had trouble staying in his seat but, he accomplished his goal. It took until 4th grade to get on honor roll, but just like he said, "He would be on honor roll like the rest of my kids". So, once again he challenged his will and decided to pick up a basketball in 6th grade. He came home and said, "I am going to tryout for my school basketball team ." I stated, "how, you don't know how to play?" He told me he would figure it out. Now, he's not just playing for his school. He also plays for an AAU basketball team. 

The moral of this story is never put limitations on your kids or anyone else. Always encourage them and show them how they can overcome their short comings instead of highlighting them. Make sure they turn every obstacle into an opportunity. Believe in their dream and provide them with the support and avenue to develop their skills.

This is what Autism has done for me and my 13 year old son.  If he has made a believer out of me by Naming it and Claiming It...you can make a believer out of someone too.

#Dr.Wilson

#InspireU

Guard Your Thoughts

Guard Your Thoughts 

Have you ever just been sitting there and your mind wonders and you can not figure out why you're thinking about a particular topic? It's because you are not guarding your thoughts. Your thoughts are influenced by the things you hear and see. Since this is the case, it's important to watch who you constantly associate with, what you watch on TV, what you listen to on the radio, and what you read.

All these things shape your mind and influence your thoughts. I am not saying, not to watch certain types of TV shows, but if you are battling with your thoughts on an issue, it's not wise to look at shows that glorify what you a trying to dispel. Your thoughts are so important. They are what drive you. Your thoughts can make or break you because they turn into actions. Since thoughts turned into actions, it's important to feed them positive images. These thoughts help you make your decisions which dictates what happens in your life. 

If you want to change your way of thinking and guard your thoughts, you can begin each day by praying, watching an inspirational video, reading something that motivates you, listening to something spiritual, or by saying affirmations. This will help enhance your thoughts and protect your mind. So, guard your mind, develop your positive thoughts, and begin to renew your spirit. 

#InspireU

#DrWilson

#Developingmindbodysoul

DO IT SCARED!

Do it Scared!

Is there something you want to do in your life but you have not done it because you are afraid? Was your fear so strong that you talked yourself out of it but you kept thinking about it? This is what happens when you have something in your spirit that’s trying to manifest. It will keep resurfacing until you finally get the courage to do it. 

Ask yourself, "What are you afraid of? Are you scared that you will fail or people will not approve? Is it that you are afraid that you will not exceed your expectations?  Well, the reality is, you will not know what will happen until you try. 

The feeling of being scared has occurred to me many times and I still have to get over it when I am starting something new. In 2009, fear almost stopped me from entering my Doctoral Program. My greatest fear was that I did not write well enough to complete the dissertation. I was so scared that it took me a month to submit my admissions essay, but I am glad I did. Fear could have stopped me but I did it scared and now I am Dr. Sheena Wilson.

Not fulfilling your dreams because you are scared only ends in future regrets. How will you know your greatness, if you refuse to get in the game? I always say, a loser can eventually become a winner, but the person who never starts will always be full of regrets. Do not wind up being the "if I, should of, could of, man.... conquer your fears and do it scared. 

#DrWilson
#InspireU

Dealing with Disappointment

In life there will be disappointments but the way you deal with them will determine your altitude. In my career, some would say, I have been in a season of disappointment. I call it a season of development. Currently at my job, I am in a leadership position but I wanted to transition to another area to develop additional skills.  At first, I was apprehensive about leaving because it was comfortable. I have strong connections that took years to develop. Also, I have a commitment to the community and I really love the kids and families.  Even though, I really love what I do, where I work, and the people I work with there comes a time when you need a change. Now, I always talk about taking action, so I did. In the past year, I applied for three positions that would have taken my skills to the next level but all of them ended in disappointment.

The first position I applied for I took the assessment, passed, and was put on the list. My position changed twice on the list each time higher than the place before. Then I received an email to go through the whole process again, so I did, but it still did not workout. I then interviewed for the second position and they offered me the job. I was so happy but I could not accept it because the salary was way to low. At that moment, I felt a sense of disbelief. Then I thought of the prayer I always say. I always ask God to open the doors that are meant for me and to close those doors that are not.  Even though I was disappointed, I still kept the faith and tried for this leadership intern program and I felt like this one was really the one. I had applied for this program last year and did not get pass the first round but this time, I made it to the last stage. I just knew this was the program for me but I was wrong again. Another door close, another disappointment, so what’s next, I said to myself.

That day when I received the bad news that I did not get into the program, you know what I did. I called my mom for my peep talk and it worked a little bit. My brother gave me words of encouragement and that helped a little more, but I still was disappointed. Then something happened, I came across a lady at Target who asked to pray for me and she let me know that God knows the desires of my heart and to be patient.

Then it hit me….

Continue to treats things that belong to others like it’s your own

You talent will make room for you

You want to walk in the Perfect will of GOD

What God has for me it is for ME

He has something better for you

Never Give Up

Try, Try, Try Again

Preparation is the key

Good Better, Best, never let it rest, until your better becomes your BEST

Be thankful

#InspireU

#DrWilson

Growing into You

Growing into YOU

There comes a time in life when you realize you are not where you think you should be. That’s when you have to grow into the part. This has happened to most people I know and even myself. At times, depending on what it is, I am still growing into that person I desire to be. The key is to start and never give up, because life is only fulfilling when you are growing. Most people have said to themselves, I should be farther along than this, I should have a better home, be an entrepreneur, make more money, or even have a family by now.  I say to those people, it is never to late to start becoming the person you desire to be.

The person you desire to be is just a mindset shift away. Maybe you are not that person because of the choices you have made and the road you have traveled. If this is the case, travel down a different road. It might be hard. There will be failures but this is all apart of the growing process. In order to grow there will be growing pains. The beauty of these growing pains are that they’re designed to shape you into the person you desire to be. There will be a process and your life will go through some seasons, but at the end, you will find the person you were looking for…The person you desire to BE…. 

#InspireU #DrWilson #growintoyou

I will start first. 

I am growing into the part by enrolling myself into leadership programs to develop my leadership skills so I can become an instructional leader and mentor to other women.  

So how are you growing into the part? 

Leave a comment below telling me how you are growing into the part. 

You, Your biggest Obstacle

You, Your biggest OBSTACLE

Have you ever wondered why things in your life are going a certain way? Do you make excuses for not accomplishing your goals or blame other people? Well if you do, then it's time to reevaluate things. Do you realize that your stinking thinking is getting in the way of your greatest? The only thing that is truly an obstacle in your life is YOU. You determine what your life is going to be like based on your choices. 

I know, I know, some of you are saying "You don't understand, my life has been real hard. So, many things has happened to me." My response to that is, life has happened to everyone. Are you going to let life beat you or are you going to fight back? How do you do that ? Well, you make a choice to get out of your way. You stop using your past as an excuse and start living in the present and preparing for the future. So, what you didn't finish school, that's no excuse for not being successful. All you have to do is start again, re-enroll, and finish. Whatever excuse you use to not do something you need to dismiss it to better yourself. Let it go. Move the excuse out of the way and replace it with the choice to begin, regardless of what your past says. You are not your past, that's just a moment in time that helped you get to a new destination. The difference between the old you and the new you is that you have learned from your past and can make more informed  choices. So, if you are one of those people who are dwelling on your past move that obstacle out of the way because your destiny lies in the present. 

ACTIONS DETERMINE YOUR DESTINY

Actions Determine Your Destiny 

Actions speak louder than words and when your actions does not line up with what you say it affects your results. Have you ever talked about something you wanted to do but it never came to pass? If your words haven't come true yet, it could be that you are not putting any actions behind it. You say you want to go to College, but you did not apply. You say you want to loss weight, but you do not go to the gym, workout, or change your diet. You can say anything but the words do not become a reality until you incorporate some action. The difference between a successful person and an unsuccessful person is what they do, not what they say. 

People who are successful speak words to motivate themselves but they implement a plan and work the plan until their actions get them the desired results. They do not run around selling pipe dreams that never pass the lip service phase. Now, there is nothing wrong with dreams, but dreams that are never acted on are future regrets. When you see your actions are not yielding the desired results, you have to change your actions. Words accompanied by actions are powerful and can change the course of you life. What you speak, turns into what you believe, and what you believe becomes your actions. So, speak your dreams and let your Actions determine your destiny. 

InspireU
#Developingmindbodysoul

The Perfect Time is Now

What are you waiting for? The perfect time is now. 

We all have heard the saying don't put off tomorrow what you can do today, but even though we know that we keep procrastinating. It's never seems to be the right time or we are not in the right mind frame so we continue to wait and put off our dreams. At sometime in our life, we all have done this but when will it ever be time. Well, the time is NOW. There is no such thing as the perfect time or place to do anything. You have to create that perfect moment and that moment is NOW. Stop making your dreams a SHOULD and make them a MUST. When your dream becomes that thing that drives you to get you up in the morning, then you are in the process of creating that moment. That moment could take 2 weeks or 20 years , but when you are working towards your dream you feel accomplished, you feel your growth, and it creates a sense of happiness that is unexplainable. 

Now, your dream could be anything such as completing a 5k, writing a book, being a doctor, a motivational speaker, getting out of debt, or going on a trip to Paris. Whatever it is, it will take hard work, dedication, sacrifice, and consistency to make it happen. The goal is to start and never give up. Wake up each day and do something that will make your dream closer to reality. YES, there will be heartaches, setbacks, and disappointments but those are just opportunities for growth that will lead you to your final destination. Regardless of what the outcome is enjoy the journey because that's the place where you discover who you are and find out the essence of you being. So stop procrastinating, you will never know who you are if you keep waiting on that perfect moment. So start today and make this MOMENT PERFECT.

InspireU
#Developingmindbodysoul 

LOST, STUCK, and DON'T KNOW WHERE TO BEGIN

Lost, Stuck, and Don't Know Where to Begin 

If you would have told me that I would feel lost, confused, and  unsure of myself after accomplishing one of my life long goals, I would have never believed it. It's funny how something you want so bad, doesn't live up to the hype after you get it. I thought after I received my Doctorate Degree that I would finally feel fulfilled and have it made, but boy was I wrong. 

In fact , I didn't feel smart at all. It's funny how an event that should have been so life changing brought out the insecurities of my childhood. When I was younger, I constantly battled with the notion of being good enough. How could a little girl from North Philadelphia be anything? I did not come from a family where the members had college degrees, my mom didn't have a high school diploma, and my father was a drug addict. So, how am I sitting here now as Dr. Wilson. I wasn't quite sure. I knew I put in the work. I stayed up countless nights writing my dissertation, and completing my course assignments. I wrote, revised, and resubmitted the dissertation numerous times...So, I know I have what it takes. 

I knew I deserved the title, but I didn't like people calling me Doctor. The truth is, that I didn't see myself as a Doctor and didn't feel I was worthy of the title, I rightfully earned. I didn't talk like a doctor, I didn't act like a doctor, so the shoes felt uncomfortable. Not only was I uncomfortable with being a Doctor, but I still did not have a clue what I wanted to be.  

Do not get me wrong, I enjoy being an Educator, but there was a bigger calling on my life. I just didn't know what it was and where to start.  I began to listen to inspirational speakers and ministers each day to get direction. Then a thought kept pulling at me. You like to inspire people and bring healing to them through sharing your life stories.

By nature, I am an encourager and many people have told me I should be a life coach. My reply has always been, but I need to get my life together first. How could I ever bring value to anyone else, if I didn't have these certain things myself.  So, I decided to take a step of faith and got rid of all those negative thoughts from my childhood. I decided to believe that I am more than enough. I am Dr. Wilson because I worked hard to be her. Being Dr. Wilson is the gateway to my destiny and part of my life journey to fulfill my purpose. My life goal is to encourage anyone that I come across to become the best person they can be and to find their purpose. Also, as I reveal myself to you, I hope it's healing for your soul, as it has been healing for mine.

Remember, do not let your past get in the way of your future. Your past is just a gateway to your purpose and destiny. If God gave you a dream, then he gave you all the tools to accomplish it. It doesn't matter where you are from, it just matters where you are going. 

Think Positive, Dream Big, Walk in Your Purpose

InspireU

#Developingyourmindbodyandsoul

Association Matters

Association Matter 

Have you ever been around a group of people and realized this group wasn't for you? Well, this happens when you associate with people that's are not like minded. I am not saying that the people you associate with have to be exactly life you. I am saying, you have to be around people who share the same values, beliefs, hobbies, and ambitions. Now, I know there are people that would say, I am strong enough to be around anyone. This is true, if you are only around them occasionally, but for most people, the wrong association could have a negative effect to their lives.

To accomplish your goals in life you have to associate with people that motivate you to be great. You have to surround yourself with people who have the qualities you want to develop in yourself. The people you associate with have to make you comfortable enough that you can learn from them and grow. That means you have to surround yourself with people who have what you want. Now determine what you want, find people who already accomplished it, and go after it because association matters. 

InspireU

#Developingthemindsoulandbody

HEALING FOR THE SOUL: WHAT IS YOUR WORTH

What's Your Worth 

(heartoverheels31.blogspot.com)

Women complain that men do them wrong, but is that really the case? Ask yourself, who is responsible for your life? Who controls your happiness? The answer is, You. You determine what goes on in your life , so why do you give men that much power. If a person does not treat you the way you want to be treated, you have two options, to accept it or reject it. The problem is that too many of us accept the mistreatment in hopes that the man will change. Well, why would he change. You don't require him to do anything differently because you constantly accept the mistreatment. Yeah, you get mad, curse him out, destroy his things, but run back to him like you owe him something. 

The question is what is your worth? How do you expect someone to treat you right, it you don't love yourself enough to demand proper treatment. At all times, you need to know your worth and settle for nothing less. It's like thinking you brought a name brand pocketbook and realized you got a knockoff. Now, all of us have been mistreatment at one time or another, but things didn't change until we demanded something different by changing our actions and our response to our offender. In some cases, our change of action caused our mates to treat us better, but in other cases we had to leave because they kept doing the same thing. All cases are different, but one thing remains the same. You have to love you and treat yourself right first. Know that you are more than enough and that you are the prize. You have to know your worth, treat yourself right, demand proper treatment and accept nothing less...You are worth it and your happiness depends on it. 

NOT Designed To Break

 

It is funny how situations that are designed to break you, make you stronger. While the situation is going on, it feels like there is no way out. 

The situation makes you feel helpless and the outcome seems hopeless but for some reason or some how you come out victorious.

Under any circumstance, you can have two different responses, one of Possibilities and the other of Defeat.

Why do people always assume that a bad situation deem negative results, that's not always true. You determine if you will grow or if the situation will break you. 

The results might feel negative in the beginning, but when you see the change in your life then you realize you are better off. 

At times, God allows things to happen to you to make you stronger or to prepare you for something better. In life, we will have many journeys, some positive, some negative, and some indifferent, but the ultimate outcome to any of these moments are determined by what you've learned from them. 

I know, I have learned the most from my darkest moments when I felt like I was going to break. 

Then I found the strength to go on and it was the beginning of something new and beautiful. 

At that moment I knew, I might bend but I would never break. 

InspireU

#Developingthemindbodyandsoul

CHANGE BEGINS WITH U

Change begins with U

(https://ritzpalusz.wordpress.com/about/)

People complain about their lives and often do not realize how much control they have over the outcome. Some believe that the state of their existence is a result of some outside factor that they could not control, but that's not true. 

Now, there are some things in your life you can't control like who your parents are, the way you grew up and things of that nature, but as you get older the responsibility of your life becomes yours. In that case, if you don't like things about you life, you are just a decision away from making it different. 

All you have to do is make a change. Some changes will come as a result of one choice but others may take a sequence  of choices which will ultimately lead to your goal. Now you can't expect to sit by the way side and hope things will change, you have to make this change happen. 

You have to become the change you want.

Dispel the Lies

(Image obtained from: belladepaulo.com. (2016).
Here is What I Know about Lying and Detecting Lies.)

What thoughts are you thinking about yourself that you constantly repeat in your mind or speak out of your mouth that is not true?

I am not smart enough, I can't do that, no one would ever want me, and I am not good enough...

The list could go on, but all these things are lies.

You have to dispel the lies that your past experience has made you believe. The truth is, you will become what you think. So, you have to think positive thoughts about yourself and dismiss all the false truths your life circumstances have caused you to believe. I know you are saying, I wasn't good at school, I had several bad relationships, no one ever found me worthy, but these things are all lies that are controlling you and keeping you from being the perfect you.

To dispel the lies you have to replace it with the truth.

The truth is, that you are fearfully and wonderfully made in God's image, and God doesn't make junk. You are the perfect you. You are beautiful, intelligent, worthy and able to accomplish anything you set your mind to achieve. 

You have to activate these thoughts by telling yourself how wonderful you are each day. When those lies come into your mind you have to replace them with the truth. You have to look at yourself in the mirror each day and tell yourself why you are great. If this does not work, you have to post notes on your mirror about how great your are and recite it ever time you walk by. So, dispel all those negative images with positives thoughts and enjoy being that perfect you, because she is fabulous.

InspireU
#Developingthemindbodyandsoul